Scott Walker likes to point to the truculence of his disloyal subjects as one of the biggest reasons Wisconsin has lagged behind other states in economic performance over the past few years. Late last year, in explaining why job creation had been much more lackluster than expected, he mentioned that “most of 2011 was protests, and then there were recalls.”
The implication, of course, is that there was far too much chaos surrounding our politics to allow our economy to secure a foothold. Vuvuzelas and angry shouts were the state economy’s kryptonite. And, of course, all that singing. That horrible, horrible singing.
Well now that the recall is long over and the Capitol protests are but a shadow of their former selves, Walker is doing his level best to douse the flame of sedition once and for all. Naturally, Walker being Walker, he’s smothering that fire with oily rags and kerosene.
Whether you think the Solidarity Singers are scofflaws or free-speech warriors, it’s hard to understand why Walker and his storm troopers are cracking down like they have been.
This isn’t Marquette University circa 1987, where you have to clear all the spazzes out of the dorm before your L.A. Law wapatui party so the hot chicks will show up. The gears of the economy are greased by consumer demand, not by the gratitude of plutocrats who are relieved to see all those granola-eating grandmas finally put in their place.
The latest wrinkle, of course, is that police started warning observers of the noontime Solidarity Singalong that they could be arrested for simply watching the illegal shenanigans. Later, the administration, perhaps realizing that simply being in the presence of illegal activity would put all Capitol visitors in harm’s way for the rest of eternity, relented. On Wednesday, Stephanie Marquis, a Department of Administration spokeswoman stated, in response to media reports about the warnings, that “observers will not receive citations.”
Of course, if that’s the case, you kind of have to wonder what the point was of this episode, in which a woman taking video of a singalong on her phone was warned that she was subject to arrest:
And you might also find it odd that state Rep. Sondy Pope (D-Middleton) was similarly threatened for watching from the floor above the protest. Seriously, the floor above!
And below is video of a man named Dominic Salvia being arrested for reporting on the singalong for his radio show. Here’s what he told the Daily Kos:
“Here is a third party link recording of arrests. At 10.43 minutes, I can be seen entering the camera shot from lower right. This video proves at no point was I a participating member of the protest, and was simply taking pictures, notes and engaging in brief conversations as media would do. My arrest begins at 14.00 minute mark.”
So what, exactly, is Walker’s glitch? He’s like a bad teacher who’s lost control of his classroom and has started handing out detention to kids who smirk when the class clown makes a sarcastic remark. (And you know what we do to bad teachers in this state, don’t you?)
Clearly, the Solidarity Singers have gotten under Walker’s skin, and he’s looking more clownishly villainous by the day.
Truth be told, I haven’t seen such a visceral hatred of joyful group singing since this guy:
Which gives me an idea. An awful idea. I’ve got a wonderful, awful idea. I know just what I’ll do! That’s right. I’ll butcher some beloved classic children’s literature — in the service of the greater good, of course*.
Here goes:
Every Badgerland lib liked public workers a lot
But Scott, who toiled all day in the Capitol, did not
Scott hated workers, and their evident treason
Now please don’t ask why, no one quite knows the reason
It could be perhaps that his shoes were too tight
I could be his politics skewed far too right
But I think that the most likely reason would be
That the Kochs thought our state should be Mississippi
But whatever the reason, each day at noon
Scott sat in the Capitol, hating their tunes
For he knew without doubt all those hippies and freaks
Would be in the rotunda, each day of the week
(Continued)
And they’d sing! And they’d sing! And they’d sing!
Sing! Sing! Sing!
And the more Walker thought of this socialist sing
The more Walker thought, “I must stop this whole thing”
“Why for two and a half years I’ve put up with it now”
“I must stop these commies from singing! But how?”
Then Scott got an idea. An awful idea. Scott got a wonderful, awful idea.
“I know just what I’ll do,” Scott laughed in his belly
“I’ll arrest them en masse for unlawful assembly”
He chuckled and clucked, “What a wonderful trick”
“And if they’re only just watching, they’ll also be nicked”
And he hired his old bodyguard, and he gave him some cuffs
And soon all the singers, young and old, got roughed up
The End?
*With apologies to the eternally sublime Seuss Theodor Geisel.
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