Howdy and yeehaw! I won’t be writing a blog next week for you because I’m about to saddle up the SUV and kiss my hubby and doggies and job responsibilities goodbye for a spell. This Thursday, I’ll be trading Midwestern plains for Western mountains, and riding shotgun will be my faithful sidekick Patrick, 11. (He’ll be the one in the dark sunglasses and ball cap, toting a toy rifle.)
My oldest grandson has a hankering to see Mount Rushmore and go “pretend target shooting for elk” and so suggested to the family that the Wild West was a perfect destination for a “Patrick and Nana Adventure.” With that pronouncement, he reeled me in and shut everyone else out – meaning he’ll get to stay up as long as he wants, wear the same clothing as many days in a row as he likes and, hey, who needs a bath if you stay at a hotel with a swimming pool? We two long ago agreed to suspend stupid old people rules on our private vacations.
So I’m dusting off my 7x-quality Beaver cowgirl hat (a Sandy’s Leather Shop [Denver] original, vs. knock-off) and polishing my old (likewise authentic) riding boots. I did, however, need to buy a new desert canteen and hiking boots for Patrick because we’re soon gonna blow this pop stand for the Badlands of South Dakota, the mountains of Wyoming, and a fireworks display in Montana.
It sounds simple – get in a car and drive west on I-90 – but it’s a lot of pressure, my friends, because P&N Adventures have to rise to a standard worthy of having books written about them. (We do, in fact, publish a book together after our trips.) And it was a little unsettling, preparing for this chapter of our lives, to buy a snakebite kit and to get a bee sting antidote from my doc “just in case.”
While on the road, we’ll practice our Western drawls and I’ll try to convince Patrick of the merits of wearing a bandana for a picture at the Corn Palace, but good luck with that – I already know he thinks he’s “too hot” to be photographed in a hanky. There will be a short window, however, when Patrick will get caught up in the absurdity of the palace’s “retro coolness,” and I might then be able to slip a du-rag around his neck for a quick photo op.
We’ll then go on to Wall Drug Store (sigh – been there, done that, and have the green bumper sticker to prove it, but it’s his first time out West). The scenery picks up as we enter Bear Country, and he’ll enjoy the national monument and two days of hiking in the Badlands. Then we’ll cross Wyoming for a one-night stay at Yellowstone, and next head north for a half-day trail ride on a dude ranch. Then onto Billings, Mont., to see fireworks (which are banned at Mount Rushmore this year due to fire conditions). Finally, we’ll circle back to Deadwood to stay at a casino and watch Old West reenactments before heading back to our Madison-style ranch (as in a house without horses, trails, or wagon wheels, but plenty of dogs to welcome us home).
I think Patrick is most excited about spending a night at a casino. South Dakota is the only jurisdiction that will allow children to stand next to their parents (or nana) while they are gambling. I don’t care for slot machines myself, but photos of him in a casino will score points with his school chums in the fall, so it made the itinerary.
I’ll forward pics to our Web dude, Paul, to post on our Pinterest site. I’ll show you mine if you’ll show me … you know where that leads – click Paul’s link and send us a few photos of your summer vacation to post, too. Share your fun.
Meanwhile, adios amigos, and hope to see you on the flip side of yet another Patrick and Nana Adventure.
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